Filed under: Humor
ARE YOU LAN-NANG?
1. Your standards for evaluation are limited to "not bad" (bwe-phai) and
good enough" (ham-ham)
2. You count every single centavo that comes in and out of your wallet
3. You voted Fred Lim for president
4. You make today’s rice tomorrow’s fried rice
5. Today’s leftovers are tastefully mixed in tomorrow’s bi-hun or ma-mi
6.The only thing you can read in a Chinese daily is the daily’s name
(so sue me!)
7. Your pinoy friends ask for tikoy from you, and they’re more excited
eating it than you are (now they ask for different flavors of tikoy pa!)
8. You aren’t allowed to wear black, although you want to - to look
thinner
9. Your family car’s plate number begins with 8
10. When you speak to an elder and you forget the chinese term for a
particular item, and say "ahhh hio-nge hio-nge hio-nge basta hio-nge
la!" (nyahahaha)
11. You affix "-la", "-lo" to your Pinoy/Taglish sentences
12. You affix "ba", "naman" or "pa" to your Chinese sentences
13. Your food vocabulary consists of …kiam-pong, cha-pong, am-beh,
mi-sua, cha-sio, ma-ki-mi, hee-chee, machang
14. Your parents think that a boyfriend-girlfrien d relationship is the
same as getting married
15. You Speak chinese at home, speak Filipino with friends, and write
letters in English!
16. Your friends greet your parents "a-pe or am-a, good evening!"
17. You love Lao Fu Zi even if you could never figure out what they were
talking about
18. You know the beneficial effects of chrysanthemum tea and black duck
soup
19. You say "Wa-kah-nga !" or "In-yah-kwee- yah!"
20. You’ve eaten food after it has been offered to your dead ancestors
21. You pronounce "C" or "K" sounds like "KH" like "khas" instead of
cash, "khomputer" for computer (oy hinde ha)
22. You have a cough, and your mom insists that you drink ‘ki-pe-lo’and
for stomack ache,’tsing- lo-ing’ (effective naman kasi)
23. When seated around a chinese lauriat, you insist back and forth that
other people take the first serving (basta kung kanino natapat, siya
mauna!)
24. You mix the hard-boiled egg cooked in adobo (lo-neng) with your rice
25. Tinutusok mo nalang iyong fish/meat/squid ball with your chopsticks!
26. Kung hindi mo na matusok ang fish/meat/squid ball with ur chopstick,
kinakamay mo nalang.
27. You had culture shock in college.
28. Your pinoy friends ask for the chinese translation of ‘i love you"
and certain curse words
29. You go to Hap Chan for a mid-night snack
30. The only first aid kit you bring with you is white flower
31. You are a tsinoy, when in math class, you mumble the Chinese
multiplication table when mutiplying numbers.
Ex. Di it Di (2×1=2) ; Di Di Si (2×2=4)
32. If you are male, you have a name that ends with "-son", i.e.
jefferson,emerson, wilson, harrison, stevenson, michaelson, kingson
33. You understand why "kai-shao" is more complicated than a "blind
date"
34. The first reaction from new pinoy friends is "mayayaman ang mga
intsik!"
35. At least one member of ur family has already gone to Chientan
36. You greet a friend on the phone by asking if he’s eaten (dee chia
beh?) or what he is doing (leh tshong shia?)
37. You say: a. ‘kain ng gamot’ instead of ‘inom ng gamot’ (chia iyo
kasi eh) b. ‘hugas ng picture’ instead of ‘pa-develop ng picture’ (swesiong
kasi)
